* 5 Directing a Conversation (p.5 of 8)
5.20�� When you stress that your point is clear
It�s as clear as day.�� Listen�� <�Obviously, Marta is not interested in Jeremy. It�s as clear as day.�>
It�s as plain as day.�� Listen�� <�I explained how it works to you. It�s as plain as day.�>
A child can understand it.�� Listen�� <�I still don�t understand how you came to this conclusion.� � �Let me explain again. A child can understand it.�>
Any fool can see it.�� Listen�� <�We�re going to lose this game. Our team is much weaker than our opponents. Any fool can see it.�>
Don�t you know it?�� Listen�� A �I am surprised that you don�t know such a common thing.��� <�You work too much. You need some rest.� � �A husband�s duty is to take care of his wife. Don�t you know it?�>
Don�t you see it?�� Listen�� A �I am surprised that you don�t understand such an obvious thing.��� <�Why are you running? I can hardly follow you.� � �We can be late for our flight. Don�t you see it?�>
5.21�� When you want a person to pay attention
Listen carefully.�� Listen�� <�Listen carefully. I won�t repeat twice.�>
Listen to me.�� Listen�� <�Listen to me. It�s important.�>
Open your ears.�� Listen�� <�Open your ears. I want to tell you something.�>
Keep your ears open.�� Listen�� <�This conversation is very important. Keep your ears open.�>
Pick up your ears!�� Listen�� <�Pick up your ears! Don�t miss a word.�>
Get the wax out of your ears.�� Listen�� <�Get the wax out of your ears. Be very attentive.�>
5.22�� When you are misunderstood by a person
You�ve got me wrong.�� Listen�� A �You have misunderstood what I said.��� <�You�ve got me wrong. I said no such thing.�>
You�ve got it all wrong.�� Listen�� < �You�ve got it all wrong. Listen to what I�m telling you.�>
You�ve got it wrong.�� Listen�� <�You�ve got it wrong. That�s not what I said.�>
You�ve twisted my words.�� Listen�� A �You have interpreted my words inaccurately.��� <�I didn�t mean that. You�ve twisted my words.�>
You�ve missed the point.�� Listen�� A �You have misunderstood the most important part of my thought.��� <�I�m not saying I don�t want to go out tonight. I�m saying I have a lot of work to do tonight. You�ve missed the point.�>
You�re only hearing what you want to hear.�� Listen�� <�I didn�t say that. You�re only hearing what you want to hear.�>
You�re not listening to what I�m saying.�� Listen�� <�I didn�t say George is a bad husband. You�re not listening to what I�m saying. I said George has some bad habits.�>
You�re putting words into my mouth.�� Listen�� A �You are misrepresenting what I am saying.��� <�I�ve never suggested you should move. You�re putting words into my mouth. I�ve always said you are welcome here, but at the same time you are free to go whenever you like.�>
You�re quoting me out of context.�� Listen�� A �You are taking just a few words out of the surrounding context therefore misrepresenting what I am really saying.��� <�You�re quoting me out of context. Stop putting words in my mouth.�>
You�re taking it out of context.�� Listen�� <�I�m not saying you need to retire. You�re taking it out of context. I�m just reminding you that at your age you need to work less.�>
You�re blowing it out of proportion.�� Listen�� A �You are exaggerating the importance of what happened.��� <�I know you had an argument with your husband.� � �Dad, you�re blowing it out of proportion. It was just a friendly discussion. Contentious, though.�>
You�re blowing this all out of proportion.�� Listen�� <�We are not discussing divorce. It�s just a rumor. You�re blowing this all out of proportion.�>
5.23�� When your point is misunderstood
I didn�t mean to give you that impression.�� Listen�� <�You�ve got it all wrong. I didn�t mean to give you that impression. Let me explain.�>
I didn�t mean to imply that.�� Listen�� <�You�ve got me wrong. I didn�t mean to imply that. Let me repeat myself.>
I didn�t mean that.�� Listen�� <�Excuse me if my words offended you. I didn�t mean that.�>
That�s not what I meant.�� Listen�� <�You�ve got it wrong. That�s not what I meant. Let me clarify where I am standing on this question.�>
I said no such thing.�� Listen�� <�I said no such thing. You�re putting words into my mouth. Let me reiterate my statement.�>
That�s not what I said.�� Listen�� <�That�s not what I said. You�re quoting me out of context. My position is different from your interpretation.�>
I didn�t say that.�� Listen�� <�I didn�t say that. You�re putting words into my mouth. Let me make myself perfectly clear.�>
That�s not my point.�� Listen�� <�Your sister works hard and yet she doesn�t make enough money.� � �That�s not my point. My sister�s real problem is that she isn�t frugal with her money.�>
That�s not the point I�m trying to make.�� Listen�� <�I agree with you. The government could allocate funds better.� � �That�s not the point I�m trying to make. What I�m saying is the government just doesn�t need to spend so much.�>
You just don�t get it!�� Listen�� A �You just don�t understand what I am trying to tell you.��� <�I explained the complexity of our economic situation to you a few times. You just don�t get it!�>
5.24�� When your point was not heard or noticed
It went in one ear and out the other.�� Listen�� A �Information was immediately forgotten.��� <�I told my colleague an important thing to do. It went in one ear and out the other.�>
There�s none so deaf as those who will not hear.�� Listen�� <�I tried to teach my sister frugality, but there�s none so deaf as those who will not hear.�>
There�s none so blind as those who will not see.�� Listen�� <The teacher told the parents that little Lilly steals money from other children. Naturally, they refused to believe it. There�s none so blind as those who will not see.>
My plea fell on deaf ears.�� Listen�� A �My request was ignored.��� <�I suggested that my friend Henry should get a job. My plea fell on deaf ears.�>
They turned a deaf ear to my plea.�� Listen�� <�Unfortunately, the board of directors rejected my proposal. They turned a deaf ear to my plea.�>
They turned a blind eye to my appeal.�� Listen�� <�I filed several applications with the bank trying to get a low-interest loan. They turned a blind eye to my appeal.�>
5.25�� When a person has suddenly understood your point
You got it!�� Listen�� A �Finally, you understood it!��� <�So, if I don�t go to college, I won�t get a good job, will I?� � �You got it!�>
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