* 9 Apology and Forgiveness (p.2 of 2)
9.6�� When you promise to never repeat a particular mistake
I won�t do it again.�� Listen�� <�Billy, did you try to wash the cat with soap?� � �I�m sorry. I won�t do that again. I promise.�>
It will never happen again.�� Listen�� <�Last night, you forgot to close the garage door. This morning, I found a possum in our convertible.� � �Really? It will never happen again.�>
It won�t happen again.�� Listen�� <�You left the refrigerator open.� � �It won�t happen again. I�ll be more attentive.�>
I promise it won�t happen again.�� Listen�� <�You gave the remote control to little Johnny to play, and he dropped it in the fish tank. Now we can�t watch television.� � �I promise it won�t happen again. I�ll purchase a new remote control today.�>
9.7�� When you offer compensation
I promise that I�ll make it up to you.�� Listen�� <�I gave you my car for one day only. Did you scratch it?� � �I�m sorry, yes, I scratched the bumper. Actually, the bumper had been already scratched several times, and I put a small fresh scar on it. I promise that I�ll make it up to you.�>
How can I make it up to you?�� Listen�� <�As a result of your negligence, I lost my old film camera. I have had it for fifteen years.� � �How can I make it up to you? What if I give you my new digital camera?�>
Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?�� Listen�� (used with can or could)�� <�Why did you leave our hotel room open? Now my wallet is lost.� � �Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? In your wallet, you had ten dollars in cash, two credit cards, a driver�s license, and a picture of your girlfriend.�>
9.8�� When you ask for forgiveness
Please forgive me.�� Listen�� <�I didn�t want to hurt you. Please forgive me.�>
I beg your forgiveness.�� Listen�� <�I�m sorry I forgot about your birthday. I beg your forgiveness.�>
I ask your forgiveness.�� Listen�� <�My infidelities were only occasional. I ask your forgiveness.�>
I ask for your mercy.�� Listen�� <�I admit I sinned a few times in my life. I ask for your mercy.�>
Can you forgive me?�� Listen�� <�I am really sorry for my angry words. Can you forgive me?�>
Can you ever forgive me?�� Listen�� <�I know I caused you great suffering. Can you ever forgive me?�>
9.9�� When you demonstrate forgiveness
I forgive you.�� Listen�� <�I�m sorry I asked that question.� � �I forgive you.�>
All is forgiven.�� Listen�� <�To do that was my idea. I admit it was ill-conceived.� � �All is forgiven. I approved your idea. We are both suffering the consequences now.�>
You�re forgiven.�� Listen�� <�Excuse me for being obnoxious last night.� � �You are forgiven.�>
You�re excused.�� Listen�� <�Excuse me for smoking.� � �You are excused.�>
God has been merciful.�� Listen�� <�I�m so sorry for my misbehavior. Will you ever forgive me?� � �God has been merciful. All is forgiven and forgotten.�>
Don�t worry about it.�� Listen�� <�I borrowed your car yesterday. I�m sorry, I dented its bumper.� � �It�s just a small scratch. Don�t worry about it.�>
Don�t give it another thought.�� Listen�� A �Don�t think about it anymore. Don�t worry about it.��� <�I lost your credit card.� � �Let me call the credit card company and ask them to cancel my card. Don�t give it another thought. We have other concerns.�>
I�ll let you off the hook this time.�� Listen�� A �I won�t punish you this time.��� <�You made too many typos in the draft contract. I�ll let you off the hook this time. Don�t do that again, though.� � �Thank you, boss.�>
I�ll give you another chance.�� Listen�� <�I apologize for being late for work today.� � �I�ll give you another chance.�>
That�s all right.�� Listen�� A �I accept that. I forgive you.��� <�Unfortunately, I can�t help you financially this time.� � �That�s all right. I�ll manage.�>
It�s okay.�� Listen�� <�I was sick a little. This is why I couldn�t help you.� � �It�s OK. You�ll help me next time.�>
Forget it.�� Listen�� A �Don�t worry about it.��� <�Excuse me for my late phone call.� � �Forget it. What�s the problem?�>
Forget about it.�� Listen�� <�Oh, I�m sorry. I stepped on your foot.� � �Forget about it.�>
Write it off.�� Listen�� A �Consider this loss as zero. Forget about it.��� <�Dad, I went shopping with my friend and spent a little more money than you allowed me to.� � �Write it off. You will learn the real value of money when you start making it yourself.�>
It�s water under the bridge.�� Listen�� A �This thing is gone like water under the bridge.��� <�My dear wife, forgive me my inattentiveness at the reception. I was busy talking with an important customer.� � �Forget it. It is water under the bridge. You�ll make it up to me.�>
9.10�� When you offer your opponent to end a dispute
Let�s bring this matter to a close.�� Listen�� A �Let us stop discussing this matter any further.��� <�We are going around in circles. Let�s bring this matter to a close. I don�t want to argue until we have more information.�>
Let�s drop the subject.�� Listen�� <�I insist that you�ve got to diet to stop gaining weight.� � �Let�s drop the subject.�>
Let�s bury the hatchet.�� Listen�� A �Let us stop fighting. Let us forget disagreements.��� <�We�ve been arguing about our vacation plans for an hour. Let�s bury the hatchet. I�m ready to compromise.�>
Let bygones be bygones.�� Listen�� A �Let us forget what happened in the past.��� <�We had disagreements in the past. I don�t want them to put a damper on our present relationships. Let bygones be bygones.�>
9.11�� When you demonstrate readiness to compromise
I�m ready to compromise.�� Listen�� A �I am ready to settle our argument by mutual concessions.��� <�I�m sure you�ve read my proposal. I�ve read yours. I�m ready to compromise. What about you?�>
I�m ready to meet you halfway.�� Listen�� <�My price is probably too high for you. Your offer is too low for me. I�m ready to meet you halfway.�>
Let�s find middle ground.�� Listen�� <�We both know our positions. Let�s find middle ground.�>
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